10 Keys to a Successful Marriage
Do you have a successful marriage? Is the excitement and love still present, or is the honeymoon over? Perhaps your honeymoon has been over for very a long time. But don’t you sometimes wish that the exhilaration and love of your honeymoon never ended? In a happy successful marriage, your honeymoon never has to end!
If you’re like most couples that have been married for many years, your marriage probably is boring, stale, and routine. Or even worse, your marriage might even be in trouble.
Would you like to relive the excitement and novelty of your honeymoon? Would you like to have a blissful harmonious marriage that will last forever? The key to a long, happy, and successful marriage isn’t continuous romance, even though a little romance once in a while helps. The key to a thriving successful marriage is simply doing a few things on a regular basis.
For a flourishing successful marriage, you need to learn the 10 habits of successful marriages.
Successful marriage habit #1. Constantly praise and appreciate your spouse.
Frequently admiring or complementing your lover is a hallmark of successful marriages. Happy couple have about 20 appreciative moments daily. How many did you have yesterday? A positive moment can be as simple as a smile or a loving touch. Also, be specific in your compliments. Instead of just telling your spouse that was a wonderful meal, tell her “I love those spices you put on the chicken, that was the moistest cake I have ever had, I appreciate your fixing that leaky faucet, or thank you for taking the garbage out, etc. I’m so glad I married you!”. Get the picture, now do it!
Successful marriage habit #2. Don’t try to change your spouse.
Why do we keep thinking that after we get married we can get our spouse to change? When you got married it was “for better or for worse”. Not after you get married, you’ll get him to clean up after himself, or I’ll teach her how to become a better cook. Stop looking at your partner’s shortcomings and instead cherish your differences. Rather than trying in vain to transform your lover, focus on his or her strengths and the things they do well.
Successful marriage habit #3 Accentuate the good.
Happy couples focus their attention on the positive qualities of their partner. This leads to a happy successful marriage. In an unhappy marriage, the partners are negative, frequently searching for what their partner did wrong. Sure it’s easy to get negative and annoyed at your partner, but it’s just as easy to be positive and compliment your spouse on what they are doing right.
It’s all up to you and your frame of mind. Your frame of mind will either bless your marriage or poison it. So what is your mind focused on? If you want a successful and fulfilled marriage, you’ll need a positive frame of mind.
Successful marriage habit #4. Ask rather than demand.
If you want your spouse to do something, ask them instead of demanding it of them. For example, if you want your spouse to have dinner ready at a certain time, say, “I’d love it if you had dinner ready for me when I get home from work every day”. We all want to make our wife or husband happy. So please ask your spouse what you want of them, rather than telling them what you don’t want or what you hate.
Successful marriage habit #5 Relive the happy moments of your marriage.
Couples with happy successful marriages will forget about the bad things that have happened and instead will focus only on the good and happy times. Reliving fond moments of your marriage will actually change your frame of mind and how you view your spouse.
Next time you feel down, relive in your mind some of the highlights of your marriage, such as perhaps the day you first kissed, or had a picnic lunch at the beach, or surprised your sweetheart with a special gift.
Successful marriage habit #6 Know when your partner needs attention.
Happy couples with successful marriages can sense when there’s something amiss with their partner and provide the special attention they need at this time. If you pay close attention, your spouse will let you know, often non-verbally, that they need some special loving and attention from you.
If you look for the signs, they will present themselves. Don’t ignore them. Look for the little things and respond positively to your spouse’s need for attention.
Successful marriage habit #7 Be supportive and consoling.
Occasionally we all need to vent our anger and frustrations. Often all we want is someone to listen to us. So be there when your partner needs you. Listen without judging. Be supportive and comforting. And always be on your spouse’s side. Be in their corner when they need you the most.
Successful marriage habit #8 Connect on a regular basis.
Happy couples with successful marriages connect regularly by doing the mundane everyday chores together. Whether it’s raking the leaves together, cleaning the bathroom, going grocery shopping, cleaning up after a party, or cooking together, happy couples spend time together doing the ordinary things. Of course they also do special things together by having a regular date night or movie night or game night. The point is to engage in activities, even routine activities, together.
Successful marriage habit #9 Don’t become complacent.
Please don’t take your husband or wife for granted. Even though you feel comfortable and trust your spouse implicitly, continue to have special moments with your spouse such as a monthly date, regular sex, surprise gifts, and daily compliments.
Successful marriage habit #10 It’s the little things that really count.
For a happy and successful marriage, focus on the little things such as giving her a shoulder to cry on, letting him vent his frustrations about work, cooking her favorite meal for no reason at all, or letting him sleep in on the weekend.
Sure it’s wonderful to take a vacation to Mexico together in winter, or letting her buy some new furniture, or allowing him to take a weekend off to go golfing or fishing with the guys.
But these things don’t really form lasting bonds between couples. What’s truly significant is being there for each other and helping each other without being asked. This is what keeps you happily together on a daily basis.
You don’t always have to feel passionately in love with each other. Marriage is about commitment. It’s about trust. It’s about knowing and respecting each other. For more information on how to enhance your marriage, or how to get your ex spouse back please go here .
Filed under: Articles
Like this post? Subscribe to my RSS feed and get loads more!